For all of you doulas with children, what advise can you give:

I am not certified yet, but this is one of my biggest concerns. What arrangements do you make when you have small children! You certainly can't take them into the births with you! How do you juggle you children and still give the support to your families?:unsure

You need to have a good support system and a good backup.

Living the on call lifestyle can be very tricky with young children. Do you have someone who can care for them at 2AM when you're called to a birth? Can your partner handle arranging childcare and getting the children where they need to go? Can your kids stand to be away from you for over 24 hours?? Because even if you have a good backup, you'll need time to rest and recover after a birth.

I have a work-at-home husband and a drop-off daycare center if I get a call and I'll be gone for most of the work day (doesn't make much sense for me to pay $80 for drop-off daycare if all the kids would be doing at home was napping anyway!).

So far having only one car has been far more challenging than child care. However if DH wasn't a WAHD and self-employed, ie, very flexible, I don't know how I'd work it!

DH is in the Navy. Not alot of help there, but when he's not deployed he can have an ok schedule to work with (and right now he is on a 'non-deployable' status). I do have a few friends that live around me that would be more than happy to take her, but I think it would be better if she was older. Right now she is 11 months old. But, I don't have my certification yet and I will need some time to get it. My best friends just had their first baby, so obviously they won't be able to take her. However, if we stay as close as we are, maybe in a year or so they will be able to take her (it helps even more that they live down the street!). My family and a few others are a very close knit community.
Does this sound like enough 'back up' to do the job? I know its hard to tell without knowing us, but still: Any advise would be great!

The one thing I would think about is, if you get a call at 2am during a time when your husband is deployed, would you be able to take your daughter out of her bed and to your friends' house? Or call whichever family member and ask them to come to your house at 2am? That's a tough one -- I never thought about covering nighttime child care!

DH is in the Navy. Not alot of help there, but when he's not deployed he can have an ok schedule to work with (and right now he is on a 'non-deployable' status). I do have a few friends that live around me that would be more than happy to take her, but I think it would be better if she was older. Right now she is 11 months old. But, I don't have my certification yet and I will need some time to get it. My best friends just had their first baby, so obviously they won't be able to take her. However, if we stay as close as we are, maybe in a year or so they will be able to take her (it helps even more that they live down the street!). My family and a few others are a very close knit community.
Does this sound like enough 'back up' to do the job? I know its hard to tell without knowing us, but still: Any advise would be great!

Basically you need to be able to walk away from your family and not look back until the birth is over. Sounds harsh, but taking on a client is a huge commitment. I can't imagine not attending a birth because I didn't have childcare. Even if I had a great backup, I'd die if I couldn't go to a birth because I don't have firm support in place.

I've missed 2 births in my 7 year career and that was because 2 clients were in labor at the same time. I hated every single minute of it!!

The one thing I would think about is, if you get a call at 2am during a time when your husband is deployed, would you be able to take your daughter out of her bed and to your friends' house? Or call whichever family member and ask them to come to your house at 2am? That's a tough one -- I never thought about covering nighttime child care!
I really do think I could just drop her off at our best friends house, it's down the street. And my daughter has always been very comfortable with them, I would talk to them about it of course, but I think they would help out. It might be more of 'hey, my daughter might be sleeping on your couch/with your daughter any time now, so if you go downstairs and you've gained a kid: this is why' hahaha.

I'm thinking I'm in trouble!! All of my closest family members work and I don't really know anyone I could take my kids to or call. I'm hoping that by the time I'm done and my kids are older that I'll be able to find some reliable childcare.

I'm thinking I'm in trouble!! All of my closest family members work and I don't really know anyone I could take my kids to or call. I'm hoping that by the time I'm done and my kids are older that I'll be able to find some reliable childcare.


In Evansville, there are drop in childcare settings that may be an option? Would you feel comfortable with that if you could do an interview and check out the place ahead of time..maybe have your children visit a few times prior to needed their services while at a birth so that they feel comfortable there, etc. and you know it is an okay place. Some of these drop in centers are really nice and even have video access for the parents so that the parents can log in and sneak a peak at what their children are doing while there. I know it isn't feasible or even an option for some families, but I didn't know if your area had anything like that you had considered. HTH.

I've been going to births for the last 9 months. I've been on call nearly that entire time... I had a week or two last month where I wasn't on call but otherwise there's always been someone between 37-42 weeks.

Anyway, my dh is my childcare when he's not at work and my mom is my childcare any other time. I know I'm really blessed! I am looking for a backup babysitter, just in case but I just haven't figure out anyone who is available pretty much all the time. :)

So far it's worked out fine though sometimes the logistics of getting people where they needed to be was tricky. :)

I agree, nighttime babysitter is definitely got to be harder to plan logistically. Good luck!

IMO, this is one of the biggest challenges of doula life, especially when you have small children - living on call, with the possibility that your client may go into labor tonight...or not for another four weeks. And every single one of those days, you need to have a plan for "what if" my client goes into labor, and "what if" this is a 24 hr (or longer!) birth, and like Angie said, you need to be prepared to walk away from your family and give your total support to that laboring woman.

If you have small children, it will probably be the hardest part of being a birth doula. Supporting a woman in labor, helping her when labor gets intense, being there for every contraction, helping a new mom with breastfeeding - you'll do fine with that. Not seeing your 2 yo for 27 hours straight, and then coming home and being sleep deprived for the next two days....THAT'S the hard part.

Before I started even talking to clients I made sure I had the support of my DH and a very reliable babysitter.

IMO, this is one of the biggest challenges of doula life, especially when you have small children - living on call, with the possibility that your client may go into labor tonight...or not for another four weeks. And every single one of those days, you need to have a plan for "what if" my client goes into labor, and "what if" this is a 24 hr (or longer!) birth, and like Angie said, you need to be prepared to walk away from your family and give your total support to that laboring woman.

If you have small children, it will probably be the hardest part of being a birth doula. Supporting a woman in labor, helping her when labor gets intense, being there for every contraction, helping a new mom with breastfeeding - you'll do fine with that. Not seeing your 2 yo for 27 hours straight, and then coming home and being sleep deprived for the next two days....THAT'S the hard part.

:dust:yeahthat:dust I truley would not be able to do it if I didn't have my DH, Mom, MIL, sister and BF. Between all of them I am covered. My mom is actually concidering retiring finally! She just called me yesterday to get my thoughts on it. I hope she does for her sake, that place is driving her crazy.

Another idea is to network wiht other Doula/Moms in your area and try to work out a flip/flop schedule. You take her kids for her births and she yours if no one else is avail. you can also be each other's back ups when other care is avail. Of course there would be alot of trust involved but it could also be really wonderful to you both and your kids could get new playmates.

A great support system is very important! My family is very supportive. I have five year old and a 9 month old and I'm a single mom. I would not feel comfortable being on call right now, so I do not take on the responsibility of being a birth doula. I focus on antepartum and postpartum because I know I can accommodate those clients.