You do not need to be an RN first to become a midwife unless you are a CNM. These midwives usually work in hospitals, although some will run birthing centers and some do homebirths depending on the state requirements.
CPMs and LMs do not require you being an RN.
There are several midwifery schools around the country for all routes of midwifery training.
I'm currently a distance midwifery student through a school in OR. This is a great route if you are wanting to train as a midwife because you can go at your own pace and you don't have to be onsite constantly.
You could contact a midwife in your area and see if she would be willing to let you attend births with her, observing at first and then maybe taking more assistant responsibilities.
Another great way to keep your hand in birth while raising a family is to become a childbirth educator...I've done this for 14 years since my first was a year old...my boys have grown up attending classes with me.
Being a doula or midwifery assistant can be a challenge with young children because of being on call, but teaching classes is a great way to get experience with birth and is doable with a family.
Just some thoughts. 
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Amy Madtson
CBE (former Bradley Method instructor 1993-2006) and Birth Doula (ALACE trained 2004)
http://gentlebeginnings.vpweb.com
"...giving birth should be your greatest achievement, not your greatest fear."
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