Do you ever feel like you didn't help at all?

~Tranquility~Doula · 08-26-2005, 10:15 AM

I was at a birth last night and it all went very fast. Moms water broke at 5pm and contractions started at 8:30. She called me around 9, cntx were 8 mins apart, and I was at her house by 9:30. WHen I got to the house the cntx were already 4 mins apart and she was coping very well. I did some slow dancing with her and suggested some position changes, reminded her to drink and go to the bathroom, etc. I did some progressive relaxation and then a little after 10 she wanted to go to the hospital. When we were walking to the car she said she felt, "shaky, lots of pressure and had to vomit". Well, I knew we were getting close so I told dad to call the doc. The car ride was great. Cntx never got more than 4 mins apart the entire labor. When we got the hospital her mom and sister were waiting there. We got into a room and she was complete and baby was +1! Mom and sis came in and she began pushing around 20 mins later. She pushed for 1.5 hours and her baby boy was born at 12:32am.

I know I did the best I could and all that I could given the situation and it was really fast. I still feel like I didn't do anything, kwim?

Tiffany · 08-26-2005, 10:35 AM

You know what they say! Even just the presence of another woman is helpful. However, from reading what you wrote it looked like you did a LOT! I'm sure she is very thankful for your help.

raspberrymoondoula · 08-26-2005, 11:33 AM

Sounds like you did just what she needed. helped a little early on, made sure everyone stayed calm, and was reassuring. i think you did great!

Matrescence · 08-26-2005, 05:21 PM

Ditto

1stimestar · 08-28-2005, 02:06 PM

Yep. And who knows if it would have gone so smoothly WITHOUT you there.

fearlessbirth · 09-21-2005, 03:39 PM

I agree with everyone! I had the same thoughts when I was with my sister during her second child's birth. It seems like I didn't do anything and her labor and delivery was so 'easy'. She overheard me saying to someone that I didn't really 'count' it as a birth I attended since I didn't do anything. She said just my presence was enough to keep her calm and focused and she knew that, since I'm more outspoken than she is, would ask questions and explain her expectations, etc. I didn't really need to speak up, but to her, knowing she didn't have to made all the difference.