Online doula -on IM

~Tranquility~Doula · 11-17-2005, 11:02 AM

I think I read something about this before..
Someone in labor contacting a doula on IM, saying she is having a homebirth but the midwife has someone else in labor and she's hurting really bad....
This just happened to me. I just ended up putting the person on ignore. Maybe I'm an asshole, but I felt like it was totally bogus and a scam.
Has this happened to anyone else here?

kelley piasecki · 11-17-2005, 11:23 AM

Noelia.....I have read that this has happened before, and they are sick people playing around because they have nothing better to do. Hopefully this one wasn't for real, but it sure sounds like the others.

Did she try to contact you through email, or just IM??

Kalamazoo Doula · 11-17-2005, 11:45 AM

This happened to me! I had thought it was the real thing, until I had heard later about this being a new trend! I felt sick to my stomach! I felt that it was a weird situation any ways, but I knew that my IM personanel info stated that I was a doula. So I just assumed the 'laboring mom' did a search on the IM list for doulas, and found me, and saw that I was on line, and needed support. I thought it was a friend of mine being an ass, and joking with me, but it wasn't. I have not had it done to me again though, and if it ever does, I'm just going to ignore them.
It is not funny! The 'funny' thing is, the things that people 'think' are humorous! These people really need to get a life! I bet it is kids. They now can't get away with Caller ID, so they have to resort to instant messages!
Okay I'm done

tlcdoula · 11-17-2005, 11:51 AM

Yes, this has happened to me twice. The person changes his/her name everytime, but the story line is the exact same.

~Tranquility~Doula · 11-17-2005, 11:55 AM

Then I don't feel so bad for ignoring this person. I didn't let it get too far before putting her on ignore. She said was hurting and having a homebirth. I asked if the midwife was there and she said yes. Then she asked if I could be her online doula. I told her that I was going to leave very soon so I really couldn't. Then I asked if her midwife could support her and she said the midwife had another client in labor. That's when I put her on ignore.

What a bunch of sickos! These people really do need to get a life.

~Tranquility~Doula · 11-17-2005, 11:56 AM

Quote:

Did she try to contact you through email, or just IM??

Just IM.

Oh, and I asked how she found me and she said she just did a search for doulas. I'm guessing she is messing with someone else right about now.

Matrescence · 11-17-2005, 01:43 PM

I've had it happen once too, thankfully already heard about it from another doula list so knew to ignore him/her??

Tiffany · 11-17-2005, 02:54 PM

Okay, that is nuts! And I can't believe how many of you have had it happen to you! I am rarely EVER on any IM program, and don't usually have it listed in a profile. That is one thing I fear when I run communities like this. I have a VERY watchful eye for potential trolls. You'll know if we ever have a problem with it here because I am NOT calm about it.

This is a good time for me to say: If you EVER have reason to question the validity of an alldoulas.com member, or have an uneasy feeling about someone, or know a particular username has been used on another board or list and they were a "problem" member or a troll, PLEASE do not hesitiate to send me a PM or email. Always bring an issue like this up to me privately, so I can investigate and handle it appropriately.

1stimestar · 11-17-2005, 07:20 PM

Actually it isn't that new of a phenomenon. (Did I spell that right? lol) It's been going on for years. I mostly get "women" who want to ask me a few breastfeeding questions and it turns worse from there. My normal answer is "Sure if you aren't a sick pervert who confuses breasts as sexual objects who just wants to waste my time."

Tiffany · 11-17-2005, 08:34 PM

What instant messenger are you all logged on to when you get these messages?

~Tranquility~Doula · 11-17-2005, 09:09 PM

I was on yahoo.

1stimestar · 11-18-2005, 01:12 AM

Yahoo but used to get them from ICQ too. There are just a lot of perverts out there.

Kalamazoo Doula · 11-18-2005, 01:23 AM

I was using AOL IM when it happened to me. I had my buddy list on auto add, so it added this person to my buddy list automatically. After this had happened and I found out that this is a new trend, I really wanted to IM the person back and ask if they were just screwing with me! But since I'm not that confrotational (even in cyberspace) I did not do it!

Should ah, could ah, would ah!

1stimestar · 11-18-2005, 11:27 AM

Oh come on Erin. Do it lol.

tlcdoula · 11-18-2005, 02:15 PM

I have had it happen on Yahoo as well.